Gobble gobble....

Well.. Happy Turkey Day- it is Thanksgiving here in Canada and though I had so so so much to be thankful for I am also scared shitless right now so it is hard to think of anything else. Tomorrow at 7:40 in the morning I will be having a catscan done on my brain. I have not been well as of late- terribly weird things happening to me numbness tingling, lightheaded, heart palpitations... and on and on... they don't know what is wrong with me but it is becoming debilitating and I am not able to resume my regular daily activities - it's becoming scary - very scary. I find myself paralyzed with fear and having anxiety attacks on top of everything else I am feeling as well- scared scared scared. So many people I know lately are being diagnosed with this or that - mostly cancer and scary shit like that and I am scared. I can't leave my babies- nothing can be the matter with me- it just can't- totally unacceptable!!! So tonight I will probably stay up all night because I won't be able to sleep and then tomorrow after my catscan I have to go on a school trip with my babies- great- what timing eh.. anywya I will let you know when I know- send your zen my way and hope its nothing- yes let's all hope it is something stupid... or nothing at all .. something tells me it won't be that easy- something tells me I am in for a fight....