Mooooooo

So the summer is going by soooo quickly it is scary- I feel sorry for the kids- not that they say anything- but I feel like I have ripped them off, like I haven't done anything with them this summer- we've done some visiting, and had a couple of playdates and yesterday I took them for a movie (never again by the way) but I feel like they haven't done much this summer- Mind you they are only 4 - what the hell do they know? But still, I want to make the most of the summer - this September they go to school all day every other day and it will be so much for them... sigh.. anyway today was nice though- they had a playdate and I got 3 hours by myself! The first time I think since CC went away! It was glorious! I spent like 2 hours in Walmart... ohhh sigh speaking of which- you know sometimes I look at myself and think, no, I'm not so bad, I'm not really that fat- and then, you go and try to buy some clothes... then reality punches you right in the fucken face! Because I had the time alone, I was at Walmart and I was trying to find a bathing suit wherein I didn't look like a cow, and sadly, there was no avoiding that. So I gave up and went shopping for some capris or shorts or something like that- I mean I can't wear pants every day of my life can I? And, maybe I am shopping at the wrong stores, or maybe, more probably I guess, I am just wayyyyy fatter that I even think I am and there is no getting away from it. Who the hell is a size 00 anyway??? That's just wrong!!!!!