TOMORROW

Tomorrow
I am going to see
him.
Tonight I spoke with him
and he cried.
He's afraid he said.
Afraid of coming back.
I let him talk and cry
and didn't say much.
What could I say?
I am afraid too- for so many other reasons.
He's afraid of going back to work.
Of being amongst the people
he drank with
and did drugs with.
He's afraid he can't have a life without drugs.
That's all he's ever known in one way or another.
He told me he wanted me to leave him.
That he did all of these things
so I would leave him and that way
he wouldn't be the bad guy.
Funny-
but I told him that very same thing about a million times.
I told him that's what I thought he was doing.
But of course-
he said I was wrong.
But that's what he thinks.
That's why he thinks he did what he did.
But sorry Charlie-
the story doesn't jive with me.
But for my instincts
and me accusing you of being with a girl when I really had no proof
and of course before you confessed-
you would have just come home that next morning.
And I would never have been the wiser.
I would have been mad for a few days
and not spoken to you.
Buying your story about getting to drunk with the "guys" and not wanting to drive home.
You know, that story you've told me a million times.
And slowly-
things would have gotten back to normal.
And you would have continued doing what you were doing-
all of it.
And you would have gone away for work again.
And led your life the way you have been living it.
But that is not what happened.
It was a good try though-
sounds like a manly thing to say.
Like somehow you are owning up to it.
But you haven't.
Not quite yet.
You know what I think?
I think you heard someone else's' story
in your meetings.
And it sounded like a "good fit"
and so you have now accepted it as your own.
But you know what?
I may have been stupid for a long time.
But I'm not anymore.
And that ain't gonna fly with me my friend.
Not this time...