LA--OOO--OOSER !!!!!

Well well well.... you know when someone is down on the ground writhing in pain? Do you really think that is an appropriate time to go and kick them? Or perhaps piss on them ? No- it isn't yet someone obviously does because not only is CC back to his old tricks again- but he got laid off last night- the whole crew of them- then on the way back home gets a speeding ticket- goes to Fatasses house and comes home at 1 a.m. and after I confront him he admits to having "a couple of pints" which he didn't because there was no trace of it I could smell- so which means inevitably he is back to doing coke again. SO I told him (which is true) that he better fess up to whatever it is he is doing because the drug tests I ordered will (hopefully) be here in a couple of days (I had to order it from the states because unlike the US you can't go into a drug store or what not and buy them-)and he will do it- and if he doesn't he is lying obviously and if he does do it and its positive- well he's out so unless that test comes up negative- he's fucked - So now he has no job again and I have to see his fucken face daily now for who knows how long- then he started saying he was going to go out west to work- fuck he should just go - then I could separate from him and not have to have him here in my face or near me or the kids- I could establish the fact he doesn't live here again and have a status quo for the courts meaning he was paying the mortgage here and so the separation agreement would state he has to continue that. So anyway the master plan I had started is fucked now because now he is out of work again and there is no money- I started up a bank account last week and started putting money in it- just $20.00 here or there when I knew he wouldn't miss it so I wouldn't be left high and dry- or if there was something I wanted to get for the kids or me without Mr Selfish going on about Ohh wahh wahh I want to get my new tattoo or boo hoo I want a big screen tv or the Wii or whatever- so that all goes to hell... What a fucken jerk...... I am so mad that I got built back up again- and had that hope that everything was going to work out somehow and it was all going to be ok - he's such a fucken loser.